Funny Quotes for a Person Dying From Cancer

What to write to someone who is dying

The end of a person'southward life is an important time for friends and family members to reach out with words of caring, support, and gratitude. Unfortunately, our culture isn't particularly comfy with death and dying. About of us feel stifled and awkward when we call back about what to say to someone in hospice care who has days or months to live.

Confession time: I'm a longtime Authentication writer, and I notwithstanding felt stumped when asked about writing this kind of message. Luckily, I work with thoughtful people who have direct experience as caregivers and family members of someone in hospice, and they were gracious enough to share what they've learned.

The first is Tracy Riley, who is both a Authentication authoritative pro and an experienced hospice nurse. If that sounds similar two careers, well, information technology is—but Tracy is passionate most both Hallmark's mission of helping people connect emotionally and hospice's call to care for individuals and families facing the finish of life. The second is Marn Jensen, a retired Hallmark writer and editor who has seen both of her parents through hospice intendance in recent years. Marn also continues to stay connected to hospice through participants in her 2018 Wishes for the World project.

I've organized these writing tips and approaches by theme, but you certainly don't have to stick to but one theme in what you write or say to someone who is dying. Whether y'all're writing a note, spending time with them, or both, I hope yous'll detect ideas for messages that offer comfort, bring a smile and, nigh of all, permit someone know how much their life has meant to you.

  • Acceptance
  • Thank Yous
  • I Love Y'all
  • We Will Be Okay
  • Life and Legacy
  • Lightheartedness and Humor
  • To Family unit and Caregivers
  • What NOT to Say

Acceptance

According to hospice nurse Tracy Riley, by the time a person has entered hospice care, they've accepted the fact that they're dying, and it's helpful for them to know that family unit and friends accept accepted this, too.

"They're tired of pain, tired of suffering, tired of fighting," says Tracy. "You can keep praying for a miracle, but the person who's dying needs you to affirm that it's okay to stop fighting and to focus on peace and comfort instead."

Examples

  • "I know this wasn't an easy conclusion to brand. Simply want y'all to know I back up you and I'm glad yous're making the most of this time with the people you dearest."
  • "I don't like this, but we're going to do our best with this fourth dimension."
  • "I'm pitiful, of course, merely I'm also glad you're in a place where you don't have to fight and then hard anymore."
  • "I'chiliad praying for you to feel at peace and to know how much you're loved."

Helpful tip: Hospice care tends to last from several days to 6 months. For someone who spends months in hospice, there will be more opportunities to write and visit, and so consider reaching out multiple times.

Give thanks You lot

"Thank you" is one central message that writer and editor Marn Jensen tried to express frequently to her mother and begetter during their time in hospice. Gratitude for the person's life, their caring, and their influence actually does make for a warm and affirming message. And that'south true for anyone from an immediate family member to a friend to more distant connections.

Examples

  • "Thanks for all the days you've made brighter only by existence you. There have been more of them than I can count."
  • "Thinking of the good life you've lived, the great times we've shared, and feeling and so grateful for you."
  • "You've been such an of import part of my life, and for that, I'll always be grateful."
  • "I so admire the warm, funny, genuine person you are. My life will forever be meliorate because you've been part of it."
  • "I wish we could accept more than time together, but I want you to know I cherish the times we have had and the time we still have."
  • "Thanks for being the 1 and merely you and for being a blessing to so many people—particularly me."
  • "I've been beyond lucky to know you. Thank you."
  • "You lot've been the best dad. Thanks."

Helpful tip: Embracing a gratitude mindset can help you shift your message focus from the sadness of dying to the meaning in living.

I Love Y'all

"I love y'all" is the other key message Marn took intendance to limited often to her parents while they were in hospice. It's about the warmest thing you lot can say to a family member or skilful friend, and information technology ways fifty-fifty more to someone who is dying. Fifty-fifty if it's non the kind of relationship where you say "dearest" oftentimes, this is one fourth dimension of life when you lot'll experience good that you did. And so will they.

Examples

  • "I dearest you so much, Mom."
  • "Hoping yous're having a expert day and sending you my love…"
  • "I dearest yous. Thank you for loving me, too."
  • "Information technology hurts to let you go, simply I wouldn't trade i moment of all nosotros've shared. I love you with all my heart."

Helpful tip: Y'all could also finish whatever written message with a "love" closing: "Love," "With love," "Lots of love," "Honey and prayers," etc.

We Will Be Okay

Co-ordinate to Tracy, it's stressful for someone in hospice to worry most how loved ones will get forth without them.  So fifty-fifty though it probably feels far from okay to lose someone close to you, it's important to communicate that you will be okay, and that important people and pets will be taken intendance of, too.

Examples

  • "You've taken such good care of all of us for so long. We'll miss that, and we'll miss you lot, but we'll exist all right. We'll find ways to have care of each other."
  • "Ane affair I want to make sure you lot know is that I will laurels you in taking care of the kids and do the same things for them that you would have washed."
  • "I hope it eases your mind a picayune to know Spot is going to make his new forever home with Kathy and Tom. They're happy to have him, and they promise to love him just like y'all practice."
  • "Of form, I'thou going to miss you like crazy, simply y'all don't need to worry near me. I'll exist okay."
  • "Perchance we're not exactly okay right now, only in time, nosotros will exist. Luckily, we've got a lot of caring people around us to help u.s. through after yous've gone."
  • "I hope you're not worried about anyone or anything right now. I hope you simply experience surrounded past dear."

Helpful tip: It's fine to honestly acknowledge how atrocious or unfair it is that this person you care nigh is dying. Only don't dwell there. Endeavour to follow the acknowledgement with comfort: "This is so difficult, but it's skilful to know yous're home with your family around you…" Or, "I really detest the thought of losing you, simply I'm glad you don't have to go on struggling then hard anymore…"

Life and Legacy

Information technology'due south also helpful for a person who is dying to hear they added something proficient to the world, their life mattered, and their influence will live on—in things they achieved, lessons they taught, traditions you'll keep, and beyond.

Examples

  • "I hope y'all're proud of the amazing family you've raised. Thanks for putting some skillful humans into the world."
  • "Y'all're someone who has used your life to bear upon so many others. I'll ever feel incredibly lucky that mine was 1 of them."
  • "Yous've shaped our community in ways that will live on beyond y'all, and so give thanks yous."
  • "Okay, so clearly you didn't invent a cure for cancer. But you lot've nonetheless washed so many good things in life—for your family, for your church building, in your career, and for all of us who intendance about you. I hope y'all feel great about the difference you've fabricated."
  • "Just so you know, we'll be pouring an extra glass for you at wine book club. You've been the heart and soul of our crew, and we programme to go on information technology going in your award."
  • "I wish my kids were one-time enough to know yous better, but don't worry. They're going to know all your funny stories and weird traditions. They'll know their Papa Frank is a huge office of what makes our family unit so great."
  • "A friend similar y'all doesn't come forth very often. You fabricated so many tough times easier and the all-time times even better. I agree every memory nosotros've made together shut to my heart."

Helpful tip: "The end of life is hard, simply it can besides exist beautiful," Marn says. "And then be nowadays still y'all can. Do your best to make it about that person and not about y'all or your nervousness about saying the incorrect thing."

Lightheartedness and Humor

Tracy also emphasizes the underestimated importance of humor in communicating with someone in hospice: "A person who'south dying doesn't want everyone to act sad around them all the fourth dimension. They appreciate it when someone is willing to kid effectually with them."

So peculiarly when sense of humour has e'er been part of your relationship, experience free to be real and lighten things upward a bit.

Examples

  • "Are you sure this isn't but some elaborate show you lot're putting on earlier you go off and disappear to a tropical island?"
  • "This whole loungewear look you've got going on probably isn't your best always, simply don't worry. Yous're still pretty absurd. And I still love y'all."
  • "May I just say that it really sucks that yous're dying? Hey, this is me here—not some kind of poet."
  • "Wow, plainly some people volition do anything to get out of working. JK—I miss yous, and I've been thinking most you a lot."
  • "Are you lot nonetheless allowed scotch? Because I'thou pretty sure this calls for i."

Helpful tip: Tracy also mentioned that reading cards to the people they're caring for is a common matter for a hospice nurse to practise. So keep that in heed equally you cull your words and your funny material. You don't want to scandalize the nurse…or the whole family!

To Family and Caregivers

Sometimes the people around the person who'southward dying are struggling even harder. It's good to reach out to them, too, either with words of support or with specific offers of help.

Examples

  • "Thinking of you every bit you have care of your mom. What a comfort for her to have you with her. Love to yous both."
  • "This must be such a challenging time for you and your family. Keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers."
  • "It'south okay not to be okay right now. Remember that, and know that information technology'due south fine to let some balls drop. You've got a lot of people who volition come and help pick them upwards—me, for one."
  • "I don't really know what would assist most, but I figured you still need to eat, so here's dinner on me."
  • "I know yous're not able to be home a lot right at present, so I've been keeping the backyard mowed and the leaves picked upwardly. No large. Just glad you're able to be with your dad."
  • "Thought perchance you could employ a little interruption from worrying virtually food on top of everything else, so we've got a Meal Train set upward and running for you. Promise it helps take a little off your mind."

Helpful tip: "Let me know if there'southward anything I can exercise" comes from a good identify, just information technology puts the brunt of request on someone who's struggling and peradventure not thinking all that conspicuously. For that reason, specific gestures or offers of support tend to be more helpful. If you lot spend a little time with the caregiver, y'all may selection up on things they need without even having to enquire.

What Non to Say

Basically, there are all kinds of good things you can and should say to someone at the end of their life. Simply hither are a few messages to skip:

  • "I'grand still hoping/praying for a miracle." Of course, you lot tin keep praying on your own. But when you're communicating with someone in hospice, be accepting of the fact that they've moved past this point.
  • "Keep fighting." Exist respectful of their conclusion to terminate fighting.
  • "Everything happens for a reason." This unintentionally implies that the person must have done something incorrect to deserve to dice.
  • "This is God'south program/will." Even people of faith are sometimes angry at the finish of life, and probable to struggle with this idea. Telling them that you're praying for peace and condolement would exist a amend fashion to go.
  • "You lot look great!" Unless they do, only they probably don't, and they probably know it. Just be real with them.

Helpful Tip: "Bottom line," says Tracy Riley, "be honest, be authentic, and don't sugarcoat things." In other words, exist your caring self, and you'll do fine.

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Source: https://ideas.hallmark.com/articles/sympathy-ideas/hospice-messages-what-to-write-to-someone-who-is-dying/

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