Can You Spot the Difference Stupidly Funny Jokes

Did you ever get eye rolls after telling a lame joke?

We have all heard comedians crack smart jokes which can switch on the 'wit' light in our minds. But all of us would also enjoy indulging in lame jokes too - jokes which can really make our eyes roll and cringe.

As a kid, the jokes we laughed at the most were not the ones that were super smart and took a lot of gray matter to decipher. It was always the lame jokes - they just somehow 'clicked'. Knowing your audience is very important for a comedian. Telling a wrong joke to the wrong audience will not fulfill the purpose. The best way to win a kid's heart is obviously candy - but besides that, why not try to crack some lame jokes for them? Lame doesn't always mean bad. People might have different opinions about a dad joke, but we can all agree that some of them are really funny and hilarious. Don't worry - even the stupidest jokes that are funny can have a mature twist in the joke.

Lame Animal Jokes For Kids

Here are some good lame jokes that are actually funny.

1. What happened to the bear who lost his ears? He became a bee.

2. What do you use to catch a nerdy fish? Bookworms.

3. Why are leopards not good at playing hide and seek? They are always spotted.

4. Why are bears not so good at controlling remotes? Because they paws the video.

5. How do cows spend their free time? In moovies.

6. Why does my cat hate me? It has com'pat'ibility issues.

7. How does a cow call his mother? Moooo-m.

8. What do you call a bull when they fall asleep? A bull-dozer.

9. What does a pampered cow give us? Spoiled milk.

10. What did the lion say to the deer? 'Pleased to eat you.'

11. What did the Buffalos say to their son when he was going to school? Bison.

12. What happened when the dinosaurs used deodorants? They became ex-stink.

13. What is a mailman's favorite animal? Seals.

14. Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honey combs.

15. Why did the squirrel, like my friend? Because my friend is nuts.

16. What did the wolf say when the mice bit him? Owwwww-ch.

17. What spell do you use to magically bring a dog in front of you? Labracadabra.

18. Which animal plays sports all the time? A bat.

19. What is a cat's favorite candy? Kitty Kat bar.

20. What did the Potterhead say to a lizard named Harry? "You are a lizard, Harry".

21. What was wrong with the dolphin? Nofin.

22. What happened to the toad who left the forest? He was soon froggotten.

23. Why is the panda stuffed toy so special and expensive? Because it is ex-panda-ble.

Lamest Jokes On Food

Here's a list of some best stupid but funny jokes that you and the kids will love.

24. Why did the pie go to the doctor? He was crumpy.

25. Where do bananas learn to split? At sundae school.

26. Why is everyone friends with mushrooms? Because they are fungis.

27. What was the first thing the baby corn asked the mama corn when he woke up? "Where is pop corn"?

28. What would you call it when someone throws an apple on your face? A fruit punch.

29. Why did the noodle get voted out by his friends? Because everyone thought he was the impasta.

30. How do you make an egg roll? Push it.

31. What would you call a dessert who became a successful actor? Robert Brownie Jr.

32. Why was the baby strawberry late for school? Because her parents were stuck in a jam.

33. Why did my brother eat his homework? Because my mother told him it was a piece of cake.

34. What did one cheese give another cheese? A piece of his heart.

35. What's the best thing to eat vegetables with? Your teeth.

36. What is the best way to crack open a walnut? Tell it all the best jokes.

37. How does it feel to drink the same coffee every day? Déjà Brew.

38. Why can't a man make milk? Because he lactose qualities.

39. Why did my little brother start crying when I did not give him a hot beverage? He has been very senteamental lately.

40. What candy does Instagram hate? Tiktok.

41. What kind of candies are not synthetic? Cotton candies.

Stupidly Funny Jokes Related To Science

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Check out some lame but funny jokes that will make the children interested. These are some of the best lame jokes ever!

42. How much does it cost a Neutron to buy groceries? No charge.

43. What are asteroids? They are rocks that went to the gym.

44. What do you get when you differentiate amazon? Amazon prime.

45. What elements do you need to make a joke? Sulfur, Argon, Calcium, and Samarium or SArCaSm in short.

46. What did the two tectonic plates say when they bumped into each other? "My Fault, sorry!"

47. How do scientists keep their breath fresh? Experi-mints.

48. What do astronomers do to plan a birthday party for their friend? They planet.

49. Who can save the world from asteroids? Papers because paper beats rocks.

50. What do you call an electrician who has detective quality? Sherlock Ohms.

51. What happened to the man who forgot to pay his electricity bills? He was Ohm-less.

52. What is very odd? Every other number.

53. Whom can you always count on? Your fingers.

54. Why did he mind when his teacher called him average? Because that is mean.

55. Which season do mathematicians enjoy the most? Sum-mer season.

56. Why did the obtuse angle lose the argument? Because he was not right.

57. What is a bird's favorite type of math? Owlgebra.

58. Why should you not trust a statistics teacher? They are always trying to plot something.

59. Why was the math book crying? He had a lot of problems.

Funny Lame Jokes

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Here are some terrible jokes that are funny and will surely give the little ones a good laugh.

60. Why can't you trust a guy named Amit? Because he is a myth.

61. What do you call it when your toothpaste is over? Toothpast.

62. Why are ghosts not so good at lying? Because the person they are lying to can see right through them.

63. Which app does Thanos love the most? Snap Chat.

64. How do we know when a vampire is not sick? They won't be coffin.

65. What kind of music do balloons hate? Pop.

66. Why did Nick Fury ask Black Widow to share her location all the time? So that she does not Romanoff.

67. What do you call it when you are putting together an Avenger's puzzle? Avengers Assemble.

68. What was Hawkeye's shield made off? Quicksilver.

69. What can you call the security guards of the Samsung store? Guardians of the Galaxy.

70. Why do players never feel hot while playing in a stadium? Because they have a lot of fans.

71. Which is the strongest day? Saturday and Sundays because the others are weekdays.

72. Why did the bike lose the race against the car? Because he was two tired.

73. What did my friend do when he could not find his car key? He started talking to the lock because communication is the key.

74. Why is the keyboard always tired? Because it has two shifts.

75. Why was the bullet unemployed? Because it was fired.

76. What do you call a class congested with graphic designers? Graphic jam.

77. How can you see dreams more clearly? Sleep with your specs on.

78. What happened to my friend David who lost his ID? He became Dav.

79. What happened after my doctor made fun of me having vitamin deficiency? He gave me complex.

80. What do you call a mountain that is funny? Hill-arious.

81. What did the big brother flower say to his little sister when she was born? "Hi, bud".

82. What's the similarity between stars and my grandmother's teeth? Both come out at night.

83. Why did the nose complain about the finger? Because the finger was always picking on him.

84. What kind of tree can you hold in your hand? Palm tree.

85. Why did the kids cross the road and go to the playground? To go to the other slide.

86. How do ghosts address a letter? Tomb it may concern.

87. Why did the left eye and the right eye blush? Because something was smelling between them.

88. Why are colds not such good criminals? Because they are very easily caught.

89. Why was the coffee scared? He recently got mugged.

90. What happened to the two calendar thieves when the police caught them? Each got six months.

91. How does Batman take amazing pictures? He uses Flash.

92. What do you call a hero who has to choose between having food all day or fighting crime? Soup or hero.

93. What did the fancy plate say to the normal plate when guests arrived? Dinner's on me.

94. Why should you not say an extremely funny joke to a glass? It might crack up.

95. What's the opposite of E-no? Eyes.

Lame Knock Knock Jokes

What can we count on to always have the best lame jokes? The good old knock-knock jokes.

96. Knock, Knock!

Come in.

97. Knock, Knock!

Who is outside?

Me.

Me who?

Meow.

98. Knock, Knock!

Who knocks?

Boo.

Boo who?

Why are you crying all of a sudden? Is everything okay?

99. Knock, Knock!

Who's out there?

Hank.

Hank who?

Oh, you can hank me later.

100. Knock, Knock!

Who is knocking?

Eat.

Eat who?

Eat all of your fruits.

101. Knock, Knock!

Who's knocking?

Wood.

Wood who?

Wood you please like to go out with me?

102. Knock, Knock!

Who is knocking?

Tohoom.

Tohoom who?

To whom it might concern.

103. Knock, Knock!

Who's out there?

Ya.

Ya who?

No, I'm going to just Google it.

104. Knock, Knock!

Who is outside?

Cash.

Cash who?

Not really, thanks, I am allergic.

105. Knock, Knock!

Who is knocking on the door?

A circle.

A circle who?

Oh don't worry anymore, it's pointless.

106. Knock, Knock!

Who's out there?

Doctor.

Doctor Who?

Yes.

107. Knock, Knock!

Who's out there?

Annie.

Annie who?

Annie thing that you say or do will be used against you.

108. Knock, Knock!

Who is outside?

Alice.

Alice who?

Alice well that ends well.

109. Knock, Knock!

Who knocks?

Candy.

Candies who?

Candies knock-knock jokes be any sweeter?

110. Knock, Knock!

Who is outside?

Deja.

Deja who?

No, no, it's Deja Vu.

111. Knock, Knock!

Sorry, it's occupied.

112. Knock, Knock!

Who's there?

Hari.

Hari who?

Hari up and eat your food.

All-Time Funniest Lame Jokes

  Take a look at these dumbest funny jokes.

113. Guess why learning sign language is such a good idea? Because it is quite handy!.

114. Guess why the glassblower went home early? He got a stomach pane!

115. I noticed a Fairy Tale t-shirt at an extremely low price. It was fair retail.

116. I saw a cut pig in the market. Guess what? It was porkchopped.

117. I sneezed at the best time of the day. It was at-choo-o'-clock.

118. I was dreaming of an orange ocean tonight. It was a Fanta sea.

119. I was trying to solve a few equations on circles. It was pointless.

120. It sits in a corner and still travels around the world? A stamp.

121. The cook gifted his girlfriend something she would like. An onion ring.

122. The mathematician served something special for dessert. It was a pi.

123. The teacher said that he caught something. He caught my attention.

124. There was a candy party, guess who was late as usual? Choco-late.

125. There's a place where the English and French live peacefully. It's Canada.

126. A fish swam into a wall? Dam!

127. What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.

128. What has no life but still dies? A battery.

129. Who did Frankenstein come with at the dance party last night? His ghoul friend.

130. Who has two hands and a face but no legs and no arms? A clock.

131. Where do spiders seek health advice? WebMD

132. Why can't you trust an atom? Because they make up everything.

133. What kind of car runs on leaves? An autumn-mobile!

134. How do you treat a sick lemon? Give it Lemon aid!

135. Why are there gates around cemeteries? Because people are dying to get in!

136. What do bees go to if they need a ride? At the buzz stop!

137. I just went to an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

138. What kind of dogs love car racing? Lap dogs!

139. Today I gave my dead batteries away. They were free of charge.

140. Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands.

142. Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.

143. It only goes up and never comes down, guess what it is? Your age.

144. This building has the most number of stories, can you guess what it is? A library.

145. Can you guess what the reason was that the doves got arrested? Because they staged a coo!

146. It always coming but never comes, guess what? Tomorrow.

147. The gym instructor broke up with his girlfriend, guess why? It did not work out.

148. Can you guess what coat hangers do on the weekends? They hang out!

150. The sky had to pay her bills? She gave a rain check.

151. The cat went to Minnesota. To buy one mini-soda.

152. Where did that famous painter's ear go? I saw it get in a Van and Gogh!

153. Once there was a fish with no eye, guess what they called it? Fsh.

154. Two mice went fishing, guess where they parked the boat? At the hickory dickey dock!

Best Lame Jokes

Here are some really dumb jokes that are funny and will get the best laugh from your little ones.

155. A skeleton walks into a bar and says, I'll have one beer and a mop.

156. Can February March? No, but April May!

157. Dear Math, kindly grow up and solve your own problems.

158. Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I'm not going to spread it!

159. Have you heard about a chocolate record player? It sounds pretty sweet.

160. How to get a squirrel to like you? Act like a nut.

161. How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.

162. How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

163. I asked my dog what's three minus three. He said nothing.

164. I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

165. I don't trust those trees. They seem kind of shady.

166. I got fired from the canned juice company. Apparently, I couldn't concentrate.

167. I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless.

168. I only know letters of the alphabet. I don't know y.

169. I used to hate beard...but then it grew on me.

170. If a child refuses to sleep, are they guilty of resisting a rest?

171. If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.

172. If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

173. I'm afraid of the calendar. Its days are numbered!

174. It takes a big heart to be an organ donor.

175. Morning news is where they begin with 'Good Morning', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

176. My wife is mad that I have no sense of direction. So I took up my stuff and right!

177. Shout out to my fingers. I can count on all of them...

178. The early bird might get the worm, but why do I need worm? I'm a human!

179. What did Baby Corn say to his mother Mother? Where's Pop Corn?

180. What did one hat say when he left? I'm going on ahead.

181. Where do the walls go to meet each other? At the corner.

182. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!

183. What did the sea say to the beach? Nothing, It just waved!

184. Zero said to the Eight, That belt looks good on you!

185. What do clouds wear? Thunderwear.

186. What do you call a factory making okay products? A satisfactory.

187. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

188. What do you call a fish wearing a suit? Sofishticated.

189. What is a pony with sore throat called? A little hoarse.

190. What is an insignificant elephant called? An irrelephant.

191. What do you call someone with no nose and no body? Nobody knows.

192. What does pampered cow give? Spoiled milk.

193. What's the best thing about Switzerland? The flag is a big plus!

194. Where do boats go when they're sick? To the boat doc.

195. Where do fruits go on vacation? Pear-is!

196. Why wouldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was too tired.

197. Why did you get fired from the banana factory? I kept throwing away the bent ones.

198. If seagulls flew over the bay, we'd call them bagels.

199. Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack each other up.

200. A computer once defeated me at chess, but it was no match for me at karate.

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Source: https://kidadl.com/funnies/jokes/lame-jokes-that-will-make-your-kids-cringe-and-laugh-in-equal-measure

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